Looking Back on '09

Monday, January 4, 2010
"it's gonna be happy new year..."

2009 in retrospect..

1. what did you do this past year that you'd never done before?
was a bridesmaid in two weddings, taught inner city Kindergarteners, went to The Fray concert, drove with a friend down to El PAso, went on a 2-week long vacation with just my parents,

2. did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I try to make a daily commitment to things otherwise I just burn out. Each day, I try to live fully by taking care of myself, and demonstrating

3. did anyone close to you give birth?
no, not til this year


4. did anyone close to you die?
my uncle Tom was killed on his bicycle in May. We shared lots of fun memories, especially the last few years. Love you, Uncle Tom!


5. what countries did you visit?
Mexico! I visited my friend Becca in El Paso and we spent some time in Juarez, Mx where she works with children in a children's home!

6. what would you like to have this year that you lacked last year?
more patience and understanding for self and others, how to see myself as a beloved person, the way Christ sees me and a willingness to trust Him more than I ever have

7. what date from this year will remain etched upon your memory, and why?


8. what was your biggest achievement of the year?
graduating from DBT (dialectic behavior therapy), making it through a tough year of teaching, being more open to God's involvement in my life in the smallest things

9. what was your biggest failure?
not being renewed as a teacher at the school I was at (even though I was going to resign anyway), or getting recognized by principal (which was kind of impossible), not getting a teaching job


10. did you suffer illness or injury?
normal every day battle with depression and migraines once a month or so

11. what was the best thing you bought?
I didn't buy a lot.

12. whose behavior merited celebration?


13. whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?


14. where did most of your money go?
paying off loans; food; gas; rent, the normal!

15. what did you get really, really, really excited about?
Umm...probably when two of my friends got pregnant!

16. what song will always remind you of this year:
Any of the Woodland Hills worship songs, especially "Lead me to the Cross," "At the Foot of the Cross," "Jesus Draw Me ever Nearer", "Still"--Reuben Morgan (Hillsong) "Shadowfeet" and "None but Jesus" by Brooke Fraser (Hillsong),"The More I Seek You"--by Karie Jobe

17. compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder? Both in different ways, but I don't really like those terms


18. thinner or fatter? same


19. richer or poorer? I am richer in a lot of of non-monetary ways. God is teaching me to see people the way he sees them and that is a true gift. I have become a more open-minded and loving person (but also experienced more pain because of it, I think). This year has made me a richer person simply because I lived.


20. what do you wish you'd done more of?
Writing, volunteering or missions trips, traveling

21. what do you wish you'd done less of?
Complaining, obsessing, COMPARING MYSELF TO EVERYONE

22. how will you be spending your birthday? I don't know


23. how will you be spending the holidays? probably the norm, I don't know


24. did you fall in love this past year? with life a little more than last year


25. how many one-night stands? none


26. what was your favorite TV program? Law & Order: SVU, Everybody Loves Raymond, but I kind of stopped watching TV


27. do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
no

28. what was the best book you read? When Bad things Happen to Good People by Harold s. Kushner, PRacticing the PResence of God by Brother Lawerence, and Beautiful Boy by David Sheff (a memoir of a journalist's son's addiction to meth)


29. what was your greatest musical discovery? Brook Fraser of hillsong


30. what did you want and get? jobs


31. what did you want and not get? a FT teaching job (I don't know if I really wanted it, just wanted to say I got it, and also for security/benefit reasons)


32. what was your favorite film of this year?


33. what did you do on your last birthday, and how old were you?
25, nothign much celebrated with boyfriend and close friend


34. how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?


35. what kept you sane? worship music (Woodland Hills and Hillsong), other favorite music and singing, close friends, WRITING and reading, crafting

36. which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?


37. what political issue stirred you the most? probably economic difficulties after our church's sermon series called Compassion by Command


38. who was the best new person you met?


39. tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009: Be Still and know that I am God. Lately I have been bearing the pain of everyone around me. It's like an addiction. God is teaching me that I can't do that, to say it simply, or I may die (seriously)--like the pain is so great sometimes, I just feel like i can't live in this life. god and I talk and he tells me things like, "It's okay to just breathe. Rest against by chest and just breath. Be still. Know that I AM. I am God."


40. quote a song lyric that sums up your year: None but Jesus--brooke fraser

In the quiet, in the stillness
I know that You are God
In the secret of Your presence
I know there I am restored

When You call I won’t refuse
Each new day again I’ll choose

There is no one else for me
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

In the chaos, in confusion
I know You’re Sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will

When You call I won’t delay
This my song through all my days

All my delight is in You Lord
All of my hope, all of my strength
All my delight is in You Lord Forevermore

The More I Seek You--Kari Jobe
The more i seek you,
the more i find you
The more i find you, the more I love you

I wanna sit at your feet
drink from the cup in your hand.
Lay back against you and breath, here your heart beat
This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand.
I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming